Kindergarten put me in contact with my first Religious, Sr. Mary Grace, OP. I immediately fell in love with her, and wore a rosary on the belt of my dress to be like her. In 2nd grade, a priest giving the parish mission, came to give the grade school a talk also. He asked us how many of us wanted to be priests and religious when we grew up. Almost everyone in the 2nd grade enthusiastically raised their hands. He said, “When I come back in 20 years, you will be laughing with your husbands and wives about how you wanted to be priests and religious back in 2nd grade.” I said to myself, “in 20 years, you will be dead, and I will be a Sister!” It was not that I was a prophetess, when you’re seven, 20 years is almost 3 lifetimes! Any adult would surely be dead by then.
In 8th grade, our English teacher had us write our autobiography having us use prompt questions, including “What do you want to be when you grow up?”. When I answered the question expressing an openness to religious life, my fellow classmates made fun of me. So, I quit talking about it. In High School, I asked my Chemistry teacher, Sr. Jane when she had become a Sister. She said she was 18 when she entered. My thought was “Whoa, way too young! I could never do that.”
In college, thanks to my father’s insistence, I went to the campus Newman Center. Eventually Fr. Joseph Gorentz became my spiritual director. When I asked if he had any autobiography of saints, he recommended St. Teresa of Avila’s. My openness to religious life revived, yet month after month, I never found the courage to ask Father about actually pursuing a religious vocation.
At the end of my Junior year, it was announced that two of my friends would pursue their call to religious life and priesthood respectively at the end of the Summer. I kicked myself that because of my lack of courage I wasn’t standing with them. I got into my car and sat there, making the decision to go back in and talk to Father. As I was walking toward the door, Father came out with Madeline and Reggie on either side of him. He smiled at me and said, “Now we’ll have to get you into the convent.” I smiled in relief. He said, “You’re kidding!” My smile got bigger. He said, “Come see me tomorrow, don’t chicken out.”
Father made an appointment for me with Mother Joanne. I felt very awkward, but Mother was kind and recommended that I go to daily Mass and pray the Rosary. After a couple of visits, I stayed overnight. In the morning, Mother Joanne asked me if she could put my name in the community newsletter. I thought she meant as a visitor. At first, I said no, but after a goodbye visit to the chapel, I thought, “I am 20 years old; I don’t need to be afraid of letting it be known I visited a convent.” So, I told Mother yes, she could put my name in the Phoenix II.
The Sisters would never have seen me again!
However, my sister Terri and I visited her friend Maureen who had cut her foot. Maureen’s mother greeted Terri and indicated where Maureen’s room was and then turned to me and said, “Why didn’t you tell us you were entering the convent?” In shock, I asked how she even knew I had visited a convent. She showed me the newsletter, Mother had put that I was entering with Madeline on September 8th! Mrs. McClain, asked again, “Why didn’t you tell us?” I paused and thought, why not try it out. Turned to her saying, “I just recently decided. I haven’t even told my parents yet.”
When I told my mother, she told me she had a premonition when I was 20 months old that either I or Terri would become a religious. A little confirmation for my wavering heart. The day I entered, after my parents left, I thought, “My God! What have I done!’ and then “I will give it two weeks.” That was many years ago. God is SO GOOD!